Women I love

I’m doing an actual Follow Friday post because I feel like it.

SO THERE.

These are women I love and think you should follow.

Ive limited myself to five because, lets be honest, I love me some ladies. LALOTS. These are women I feel more connected to than most, women I consider friends/ho-mances/lovers/boobie buddies. You’d like them. AND NOW I WILL TELL YOU WHY. In NO particular order.

Also, this is by NO MEANS a complete list. If you aren’t on it, its not cause I dont love you. Its probably more likely that I just am lame and didnt think of you at the moment I wrote this. Sorry. I STILL LOVE YOU PLEASE DONT HATE ME KISSES KISSES?!

1. Miss Grace

Jenny is without a doubt one of the funniest ladies Ive ever met. And I do mean MET. Sometimes when we take our lunch walks and shes all OH MY GOSH YOU ARE SO SLOW it is only because I am laughing so hard. SO STOP SHOUTING YOU JERK. also her son is one of the cutest things ever. Like really. He could win contests or be in magazines or something. AND she is a fantastic writer. A personal writer. I can hear her when she writes. I would totally get in a fight to defend her. Not her honor though. Cause thats not my fight. But i would totally cut a ho in a bar fight. if id had a drink. And she didnt want to bother. Or care. Cause she might not.

AND! She has truly encouraged me in bloggy ways. In sassy, DONT BE A DUMBASS NO ONE HAS A LOT OF READERS WHEN THEY START OUT AND IF YOU DONT GO TO BLOGHER I WILL CALL YOU A PUSSY. I WONT CARE BUT I WILL TOTALLY CALL YOU OUT ON IT kind of ways. Yes.

2. Miss Miss

Oh Miss Miss. Known to most people as “Just One Miss” i have coined the new name and demanded friendship. In a shy demand-y kind of way. Miss Miss was one of the first people I ever followed on Tumblr and she is one of the most welcoming and wonderful people I could have hoped to have found. Shes funny and silly and despite her love of the dodgers I would totally make out with her.

3. Mommy Geeks!

Caitlin is quickly becoming one of my go-to ladies. She is open and accepting and non-judgmental but still snarky enough to match my need for bitching.  Shes a rockin’ mom and an awesome geek (check out Rent a Geek) and website-er-er. And so cute!

PLUS! We are road-tripping to NY for Blogher in august! EEE!

4. GrumbleGirl - even though i usually spell it GrumblrGirl for some reason. GG, or TT as I often call her, is one of those ladies you/I aspire to be. She is incredibly funny and bright and makes me smile. Id known her for a day and I had already told her “I think I love you”. We instantly clicked. Plus her children are gorgeous and shes an amazing writer and loves shoes and helps me stay calm and and and!

You will love her I promise.

5. Meghan. Meghan. My ho-mance. My bestie. My lady-friend boobie-wife. Hater of those I hate. Lover of those I love. Mother of Desmond the Big Fat Black Cat. Meghs. Meggy MacFeggy. Meghan is braver than I will ever be and smart. Like wicked smart. Shes also very modest. She will move mountains and make these huge life-altering changes and not tell you until you are like MEGHAN OH MY GOD WHAT YOU JUST DID and she’ll be like YEAH OK WHATEVER LETS GO MAKE FUN OF PEOPLE. She tells you what she thinks and means and isnt shy about it. She has my back more than anyone else I know. And I will defend her and bitch with her to the best of my abilities for the rest of my life.

Also she got me this awesome best friends matching smiley-face cupcakes necklace that is SO TOTALLY AWESOME AND NERDY AND HO-MANTIC AND I LOVE IT.

and those are 5 random awesome ladies that i love and you will too.

Happy Friday!

Miss Grace’s “Pipe Cleaner Craft Smackdown”

The Following Post has been YOINKED completely from Miss Grace. I tried (TWICE!) to write a post about these on my own but it just wasnt as good.

(All photos, text, and menacing Reindeer courtesy of Grace)(except the notes at the bottom)(Cause those are mine)(Not hers)(Except the pictures still are hers and they were taken on her table in her house with her HUGE FANCY CAMERA OH MAN I WANT IT)(Moving on.)

Last Night, we crafted:

Don’t mind me. I’m a goofy looking tree. Following the vague instructions made me look reasonably as pictured.

My candy cane is inexplicably large. And I have feet.

They say I’m a girl, but I don’t know for sure. I do not have feet. Why does homeboy get feet?

I have a backbone! Jigga jigga what?  I will kill you with my SPINAL COLUMN OF DOOM.

OH HAI I AM PINK AND FLUFFY FLUFFY FLUFF BALL THIS THING ON MAH BELLY IS A MUFF.  Directions sez so.

For an elf I am curiously tall. Who gave me these Christmas Uggs?  My tights are manly.

Santa Pimp Swagga G. Where my hos at? We be pimpin. BUT OH MAH JEEBUS WHAT IS THAT???

I WILL EAT YOUR BRAINZ

I KILL YOU DEAD

Um, guys? Do you know there’s a boxing tree over here trying to kick my ass? Help a brotha out?

WE ARE GREATER THAN THE SUM OF OUR PARTS. WE WILL HURT YOU BAD IN THE HEAD. SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH.

Oh noes! Reindeer zombie creepo is humpin’ on our Pink Lady.

Eep!

Confrontation is icky!

I cut you with MY SPINE!!

I KILL YOU DEAD

Santa: That’s our reindeer you jerkoff!

Elf:  Simmer down Santa. Simmer down.  Don’t make me hurt you.

You made me hurt you Santa. Me in ZOMBIEREINDEEROFDOOM hafta conquer the world now. No hard feelings?

—

Notes from Kat:

1. We really did follow the instructions. They just weren’t very good.

2. The reindeer is now under a box. In my house. Because Miss Grace didn’t want it in hers. Because it is SATAN.

3. The giant Christmas Ugg wearing elf is currently riding the reindeer.

4. The reindeer may or may not be, at this moment, eating my cat. I wouldn’t put it past him.

5. Baby Jesus might have cried a lot during last nights attempt at holiday spirit. Like, snotty sobbing tears of pain and despair. Cause really? Have you seen them?

6. Hot glue guns will burn you. A lot. And then when you get home you’ll have hot glue strings in your tank top and not know why. Because really? How does that even GET THERE?!

7. Was Gabriel like, hiding the strings in my shirt when i wasn’t looking? WAS IS THE PIMP SANTA?!

8. Maybe Jesse was doing it while i was drinking awesome apple cider and eat cheese from the cheese plate? “HAHAHA” HE SAID AS HE FLUNG GLUES OF HOT GLUE DOWN MY BRA “SHE WONT SEE IT COMING!”

9. Jesse is clearly a dick.

10. Dont even get me started on the pink fluffy snow girl thing.